MINNEAPOLIS, MN  – The Fatties are on a roll, as a solid crew of Alan “The Kid” Garcia, Dave “Rings” Ringler and Jason “J-Mac” McInerney will hit the road to meet up with Dave “Minny Me” Ringler and Pat “Truck” Moriarity to take on the field in the HRL Twin Cities fifth annual Wifflin’ for Wishes in Hopkins, Minnesota this weekend. According to officials in Minnesota, the ever-growing tourney is expecting around 50 squads to participate. Proceeds exceeding expenses will benefit The Make a Wish Foundation of Minnesota.

Josh “Ten” Carroll is expected to provide the Mickey’s Wide Mouth, although he’s long since informed us that he’s only capable of drinking nine in a sitting.

A report will be posted soon with results.

GREENVILLE – The first pitch of 2006 will be thrown on February 11th, around 1 p.m. – followed directly by the first sh*t talking of the year – as an “invitation only” crew will be rounded up to participate in the inaugural wiffle ball games at The Pavilion, a new indoor sports complex near Greenville.
Members of the Fatties and the Michigan Wiffle Alliance are scheduled to participate in a series of games to help layout the fields and assist in the formation of a potential indoor league in 2006-07. This agreement should also, likely, pave the way for the long-planned “Winter Fiasco” tournament, tentatively scheduled for February 2007.
More details to follow…

 World Premier of Fat Bastard Highlight Video in Mt. Pleasant 

MT.PLEASANT – O’Kelly’s in Mt. Pleasant, MI was the scene of the Michigan Alliance Winter meetings, which saw the world premier of the 2003 Fat Bastard Highlight Video exhibited before nearly 100 spectators on the big screens at this popular sports bar. Fat Bastards in attendance, Dave “Rings” Ringler and Eric “EZ” Albertson were impressed by the video production of Viavex Studios.
“This was amazing, even compared to last year’s video,” remarked Ringler. “Everyone is in this one. Viavex did an outstanding job!”
Several issues were decided as well by the Alliance including the election of officers and an updated schedule for 2004. Be sure to visit the Alliance’s site at www.michiganwiffle.com, which will soon be updated with many more details.

Last minute entry bows to eventual champs in semi-finals
ESSEXVILLE – “ The Fat Bastard team of Eric “EZ-E” Albertson, Dustin “The Wind” Nichols, Dave “X-Man” Ringler, and Todd “Mary Ann” Vinsaw fared well in the very competitive WiffleHouse Invitational, finishing fourth out of a dozen teams. Competition included several college and minor league baseball players as well as most of the best wiffle® players in the state.

The Alliance squad of Dave Ringler, Alan Garcia and Jimmy Galvan finally broke through to qualify for the Fast Plastic National Championship in Austin, TX, coming in second in the Midwest after two heartbreaking one run defeats to The Bandits down in Carol Stream, IL.
Keith Patty, of the Bandits, was kind enough to supply our quote of the month to a mildly homophobic Jimmy Galvan, “Are you a switch-hitter?”

A new site has been launced as the Internet home of all things Michigan wiffle ball. Please see www.michiganwiffle.com.

Second Pre-Season Event held, this time without the prettiest wiffle ballers in Michigan
FLINT – The Michigan Wiffle Alliance held its second event of the young season on March 31st. Representatives of the MMWA and MLY battled the weather and each other on a blustery Easter Sunday at Bradley Park in Flint, one of the MLY’s regular fields.
The event was a closely guarded secret from the Fat Bastards, who were only aware of the game through their advance scouting unit, Bockasaurus Services, who had collected and shared evidence of the event during an afternoon intelligence briefing with the Commissioner’s office.
When questioned as to the percieved slight, MMWA Commissioner Alan Garcia pleaded the case, “When the Fatties show up, it’s an Olympic-style wiffle ball “dream team.” We were just trying to get a few swings in and close the skills gap we face on the East Side (of the state). We want to actually be competitive this year at the Fat Bastard.”
For more, see the LINKS page to find out more about the MWA, MMWA (WiffleHouse) and the MLY.